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HELD · for the loss of a pet

a pet loss card deck — fifty-two small companions for the quiet house

Tap any card to enter its room — the idea behind it, and the people sitting with it right now.

HELD pet loss deck
The physical deck

52 companion cards + 2 title cards · free US shipping · secure checkout

Buy now — $28.99
GROUND · IYou don't have to face the whole empty evening. Ten minutes is a real unit of time.GROUND · IIGrief this size for an animal is common, whatever anyone says. Daily love tends to leave dai…GROUND · IIIAn invitation: a glass of water, slowly. Tending yourself can count as continuing their care…GROUND · IVYou're allowed to step outside for one minute, even when the walk is empty. The air is still…GROUND · VHowever many days it has been since, you have made it through all of them. That record is yo…GROUND · VIYou don't have to eat well. Small and boring is enough. Grief burns fuel.GROUND · VIIIf sleep won't come in the too-quiet house, rest still counts. Lying in the dark, breathing,…GROUND · VIIIAn invitation: one hand on your chest, three slow breaths — the calm the petting used to giv…GROUND · IXYou're allowed to let something be easy today. The bare minimum is still a minimum met.GROUND · XWhen a wave hits — at the door, the bowl, the leash hook — you can plant your feet and name …GROUND · XIYou don't owe today anything but water, food, and rest. The decisions can wait.GROUND · XIIA house can feel wrong when a heartbeat leaves it. Many people find the quiet is the loudest…GROUND · XIIIYou don't have to explain the empty spots in the house to anyone — including yourself — toda…FEEL · IThere is no 'just' a dog, 'just' a cat, 'just' anything you fed and loved daily for years. Y…FEEL · IIThere is no correct way to do this. However you're grieving is a way of grieving.FEEL · IIIRelief that their pain ended and heartbreak that they're gone can arrive together. Grief can…FEEL · IVYou're allowed to laugh — including at the ridiculous things they did. Joy and grief can sha…FEEL · VYou're allowed to cry at a food bowl, a leash, a patch of fur on a sweater. The routines hel…FEEL · VINumbness is not failure. Sometimes the mind doses reality slowly to keep the whole house sta…FEEL · VIIYou're not required to be comforted by 'you can get another one.' You owe that sentence noth…FEEL · VIIISome days may be unexpectedly okay. You're allowed to take them. They aren't disloyalty.FEEL · IXIf guilt keeps replaying the signs and the timing, consider: you decided with a caretaker's …FEEL · XIf you had to choose the ending: choosing it was care under the worst possible terms. You're…FEEL · XIA hard day after a good one isn't a relapse. Grief moves like a tide, not a staircase.FEEL · XIIYou will not always feel exactly as you do right now — not because it fades, but because lif…FEEL · XIIIWhatever came up when you drew this card is allowed to be here. You don't have to justify gr…REMEMBER · IYou're allowed to say their name out loud today. You said it ten times a day for years. It s…REMEMBER · IIAn invitation: tell the story of how they came to you. Every telling keeps the door open.REMEMBER · IIIIf you're afraid of what they understood at the end: love ran in the language they were flue…REMEMBER · IVYou're allowed to keep the collar, frame the photo, save the whisker in a drawer. Objects ar…REMEMBER · VTheir spot is allowed to stay their spot. You don't have to fill it, cover it, or explain it…REMEMBER · VIAn invitation, when you're ready: buy the treat, walk the route, sit in their patch of sun. …REMEMBER · VIIThe exact sound of them can fade while the feeling of them stays. Both count as remembering.REMEMBER · VIIIIf you still catch yourself saving the last bite or stepping around where they slept — that'…REMEMBER · IXYou're allowed to mark the gotcha days and the hard days, or skip them entirely. The calenda…REMEMBER · XThey were more than the last day. You're allowed to remember the long, ordinary middle — the…REMEMBER · XIAn invitation: ask someone who knew them — the vet tech, the neighbor, the sitter — for a st…REMEMBER · XIIGrief is often love that outlived its routines. When it aches at the old hours, that's the l…REMEMBER · XIIIYou're allowed to grieve the future you'd imagined with them — the trails not walked, the ye…TEND · IAn invitation: text a pet person the words 'today is hard.' They won't need an explanation.TEND · IIYou're allowed to let people help badly. The words may be clumsy; the care in them usually i…TEND · IIIYou're allowed to skip the park, change the route, and take the long way past nothing at all…TEND · IVWhen someone asks what you need and your mind goes blank, 'sit with me' and 'distract me' ar…TEND · VYou're allowed to mute the pet videos for a while if they burn. They'll still be there, and …TEND · VIAn invitation: one kind thing for tomorrow's you — coffee set up, a note with one small task…TEND · VIIIf the heaviness stays very heavy for very long, pet-loss lines and groups exist because thi…TEND · VIIIThe bowl, the bed, the toys — there is no deadline. Away when it helps. Out while it helps. …TEND · IXIf there's a person you never have to perform for, you're allowed to lean there without apol…TEND · XAn invitation: reach for warmth — tea, a blanket, sunlight, their blanket if you want it nea…TEND · XIIf another animal ever finds you, it would be an addition, not a replacement. And never is a…TEND · XIIYou're allowed the patience you gave them — at their slowest, their messiest, their most afr…TEND · XIIICaring for yourself in this is not forgetting them. It can be the last instruction of the ca…

Own the physical deck — 52 companion cards + 2 title cards, tuck box, made to be held. Buy — $28.99